A Guest Speaker

A very good evening to all of you.

It is with my utmost pleasure to welcome you guys to the talk today.

We are very honoured to have with us here today Miss Tan from i-GAP, which means inter-generational affinity project. Or in short, I-Bridge-the Gap who will share with us her experiences volunteering with the elderly.

To elaborate a little further, i-GAP is made up of a group of committed volunteers who aims to bridge the gap between the elderly and youth by organising various activities for the elderly. For example, outings, exercises and also painting and cleaning for the elderly homes.

Miss Tan has been with this group for a period of 2 years whereby she started out as a volunteer and now a committee planning team member.

Motivated by her great interest in gerontology and disability, she is currently pursuing a graduate diploma in social work in NUS. Being a compassionate and purpose driven person, she hopes to contribute more and better to the area of gerontology.

Personally from what I know about her, she is a person who is open to suggestions, someone who is very keen to learn, someone who is more than willing to help anyone to her best abilities. A very mild tempered and patient person, you can be sure she is the best person to talk to when you are feeling upset. She will listen to whatever you have to say.

But for now, let us listen to what she has to say.

A round of an applause for Miss Tan.

__________________________________________________________________

Any yes guys, the Miss Tan is none other than me,myself and I. Miss Agnes Tan Meijing

My lecturer did this exercise in class on Monday and asked all of us to introduce ourselves from a third party point of view. You have to sell yourself like how you would sell a guest speaker to your audience. Say all the good points about the person so that the audience will feel that they have not wasted their time to come for the talk.

I had trouble with it. Instead of saying my good points, I just talked about the activities I have joined and my past history as in where I graduated from and where I worked at previously...etc etc.

She also said something about knowing your strengths so that you can build on them. It is only by knowing your strengths before you can improve on your weaknesses as well. And that all these lie in self responsibility on whether you want to improve or not. We all have a choice, it s just a matter of whether we want to live with what we have or change it. If it is the former choice, then dun complain and live with it. If it is the latter, then make the effort to change it. Nobody can change it except you. We have the power to control our own lifes, and not leave it all up to fate.

As usual practice, let me end off with a quote :

"Change those things which you can and accept those you cant. "

Friends out there, do me a favour.. Drop me a few comments on my strengths will ya? so that I can know myself better. Try asking your other friends about your strengths too and you will realize you are actually not such a bad person afterall =)

Cheers,
Agnes

After a long hiatus...

"To have eyes and fail to see..." Helen Keller

This was what Helen said when asked what could be the worst calamity to befall on any human beings. What say you?

Dear mummy,

It has been a LONG, long, LONG while since I dropped by here. Almost one year has passed and this year it is the second year since you have left.

Time does heal but never fully. A few things happened and jolted my memories of you.

Recently I have been bogged down by my own self esteem problem. Something which I am not sure whether you knew when you were still alive. It has always been a problem which I am trying to rectify and something which I have hopes of overcoming soon.

I know it s never easy to change, especially it has been me like this ever since.... I cant remember when. Reflection is an important aspect to assess whether you have changed and most important is whether you have the discipline to reflect and the discipline to change.

I have reflected and I think the main problem lies with my self discipline. I have always been lazy and you should know this better than anyone (*hiding a guilthy face*). Everytime I made a pact with myself to change, I lacked the discipline to make it happen.But I am not going to give up. And now it is the time I give myself another chance. Slowly I will. Right, mummy?

Mummy, I am back to school again studying something which I don't think you would have agreed to it. Social work. I have always wondered if you were alive, how different my life would have been. I would have found a stable job and work just like that because I would have to have that financial independence to support you and myself.

You have given me more than I have ever given to you, even after you have left for a better world. The money you have left me gave me the best opportunity to pursue what I want. This is one of the best ways which I can ever utilise the money. For the good of myself and the rest who needs it. Help yourself to help others as they said it and I hope one day I would be able to achieve it.

Quite a lot have happened during this year. So much so that I do not know where to start. Mummy, why don't you tell me what you want to know? Or maybe let me guess what you would like to know? My love life???? I can imagine a BIG yes from you hahaha...

Nope, nothing at the moment and not for the near future. Because my main priority is to find back myself during this year. It is a resolution I made and I wish to put all my energy in making it come true. Simply no distractions.

So in the meanwhile, mummy just help me keep a lookout for good candidates and keep them away from me till I am ready k? hahahaha.....Maybe give me an omen when the right one has appeared like maybe drop a stone on my head or something like that. The right one, I deeply believe, will appear when the time is right. And this I know, I will know, something which I firmly believes. Even if he does not appear in this lifetime, I have enough love from people around me to keep me blissed for the rest of my life.

Relationships are not just for the sake of companionship but the mutual love that exists and that mummy doesnt come easy. Idealistic it is, and it should never succumb to reality.

Ok, let me just give you a brief account on what have happened for this past year. I have recently been to Tibet, the holy land. Standing high up, I feel so much closer to you. Feeling that you are just looking upon me, peeking behind the clouds right there at the corner and protecting me against all possible dangers. I have gotten to know a few friends and that was I think the best gifts from the trip. How fates are interwined and how every trip brings another trip along with them.

Today, I just came back from Kukup, a fishing village in Malaysia. Truly, it is the companionship that counts. Sometimes it doesnt matter where you go, it s the people you are with. This can never be more true for this trip. So dear igapians, thanks for the wonderful memories...the fireworks are fanatistic! Mummy, did you see them?

Coming Dec, I will be going to Mynamar and all for a good cause. Finally fulfilling a dream since 4 years ago. A YEP project. Excited for it. Please give me the strength to contribute and not to be a burden.

I have been exploring Buddhism and its way of philosphopy. Interesting it is, but complicated still. To me, it is a way of living more than a religion. Religion it is called due to convenience and convention. I believe it is all in the heart and not really in the things you do, though some aid in the spiritual development. Somehow I believe, it can help me to become more focused and to be a better person so that one day I can free the 'me' in me. And you will agree to it, won't you?

It doesnt feel any much better to have goals and dreams in life. I am glad I have found a direction in life. Unsure I still may be at times, but if you never try you will never know right. And dear agnes, just for once try to shake your ego aside, forget about what people thinks, and have more confidence, will ya? I am sure you will be much better off.

I am so longwinded!!!!!! Suddenly I do not know what else to write. I always repeat what I say...so sianzx hor..hahahaha. Ok just let me end off with the quote I have started.

To have eyes and not to see.
To have ears and not to listen.
To have brain and not to think
To have heart and not to feel.
So have you been seeing, listening, thinking and feeling? Or have you forgotten what they are?

With love,
Agnes

P.S: Dear mummy, hopefully my next entry will not be another year later. Will try my best to visit you soon again. Cannot be lazy le! But most importantly it is to have the mood to write. Just hope my mood will be there.